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[21 Oct 2009|04:12am] in singapore. so hot, so bored. next week, back to reality, back to having to work and look for a job at the same time. i'm missing something in my life. i'm need control of my feelings! garh. leave your mark

emotional bankrupt. [03 Jun 2009|10:02pm] [ mood | happy ] ...baby lets fly tonight, fly to the moon and grab the stars. wish upon it, and let it go so you say the night is young, you take my hand and made me dance. the song that's only in our minds. the night has only just begun. oh baby, you wake my butterflies, with you there's nothing i can't surpass. so stay with me this very night, with all the stars that are shining bright. i'm terribly bessoted. i've recently realised that i don't know what i've studied at uni is what i should pursue. i know it is terrible to only realise after thousands of dollars has been spent, investing in years of education in institutions that i have attended in the last few years. i know failure is not a choice, it something that just creeps up to you if you give up. cause you can't really fail if you don't give up. the feeling that consumes you while you realise that defeating failure might cost you an arm and a leg or just your soul, makes you wonder if you're cut out for the industry to begin with. many a time, i have thought i had an unbreakable wall of steel for an exterior. i have slowly let my guard down and thus my confidence has been challenged. dwindling a little bit more everytime someone else is invited into my slowly depleting realm of self loathing confusion. i'd like to say that having grown a few more years has made me a more lackadasical person whom most days doesn't give a toss about what's happening with other people. but a little part of me still cares about every facet of everyone's lifes simply because i carry that "KAY PO" gene pool that comes from being a makcik malay. hah. i guess what i should really be doing is, thanking the stars that i have a job. albeit it's sheer existence makes me want to gag myself. it also makes me want to re-think whether the human race is just as crude as our other counterparts, the animals. meh. i should really be thanking God, for giving me the opportunities that i have been given to move to another country and face life. and also be able to afford (or not) to study what i wantED. hmm another thing to ponder about i guess... marooons won! ohh yay! (= mackay on friday. lets hope swine flu does not get me!!! 1mark leave your mark

April! [02 Apr 2009|01:03pm] i have been spending a lot of time at work. haha well maybe because working almost 40 hours requires you to be at work. My car makes funny noises when i reverse.. i don't know what it is.. but my spidey senses tell me that i should maybe put it in for servicing. MAYBE. Jamie and James came to work to do their shopping and it was fun cause i'd spent 10 hours at work and also they were wheeling me around. on top of that. i persuaded them or maybe just James to make Jamie make me dinner with the bribe of making them Chocolate cake! hahaha. Silvia gets here in 7 days. I am so excited it's crazy.. i'm saving money like nobody's business so we can gallavant aorund Gold Coast like we're famous. hahah. then it'll be Maz's and my 21st!!!!!! and that would be greateeeooo. anyway. i'm Over looking for a job at the moment. They've trained me to be one of the Casual supervisors so i'll stick to it for about 6 months since it pays pretty well and i am povo. haha. Easter next weekend which meansss a whole lot of nothing to do! (= hope it doesn't rain much when Silvia's here cause then it'll suck. Byron, Brisbane, The worlds... it's gonna be great. Alright.. i better hop and jump (drive) to work soon. need to get my brows done before work cause they are DISGUSTING. (= leave your mark

[16 Mar 2009|10:24am] i've been on a hiatus for.... TOO LONG. hahah moved into my new house and i love love love LOVE it to bits. i've got an ensuite too.. life, at the moment is prety good. all i could ever ask for was for my student debt to be paid ten it'll be all peachy but other than that, it's been amazing. i've got great friends, my family back home is alright, i'm healthy and my car is not dead cause it has petrol in it. haha. Silvia's got her flight booked for my birthday which shall be an amazing event cause well, two 21st in surfers together = MAY fishbowls of assorted kinds and scattered memories for some! (= can't believe i'm a graduate with no job. recession loves me! ANYWAY, Coldplay last monday, was nothing short of AMAZING!! pictures are on FACEBOOK. but yeah.. we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves, though my bum wasn't having too much fun after the soreness it had to endure due to sitting on the floor of Annie (brons car). GAY AS FUCK! but oh wells. anyway. i shall post ONE picture i guess.. haha i have lost my camera so photography has been limited to what i can steal off people. (= WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE k bye. need to clean and wash clothes like a mother who just sent her child to primary school! OK LA! leave your mark

BDO 09! [21 Jan 2009|11:06pm] BIG DAY OUT WAS AMAZING!! Cut Copy was amazing... who was even more amazing!? LUPE FIASCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Arctic monkeys was dissapointing, Living End was.... WHITENOISE!!! ahha.. and HOT CHIP and Cirds of Tokyo was alright but THE GRATESSS ommmmggg.. weeows! ok i know, no one really cares, but i do. had so much fun.. dreassing up as Red Indians and all that jazz.. now i'm losing my voice thanks to it though! heh. I drove us to Parklands and parked at UNI baahaha. that even more funny cause the lot was full! crazy eh. us in our get ups! the girls! the please don't rain / be sunny dance! it worked! haha parking lot of Griffith Uni! but yeah.. my car did not get towed. lucky! and we didn't get a ticket so we are very VERY lucky cause i parked my car at a Not Authorised area! haha. (= rebelll! the amount of people on the other side of the tent to Ting Tings! we were outside the mosh/tent for it.. oh wells! so anyway, moving house AGAIN, but twill be fun i'm sure... NOW I CANNOT WAIT FOR SPLENDOUR! i wonder when the line up will be out!!! ok anyway, i shall retire for the day.. my nose feels crap and my throat has sandpaper rubbing against it's walls! night night. leave your mark

[09 Jan 2009|10:14am] I FINALLY GOT MY CAR BACK! i'm so happy.. haha so happy i drove Ailsa and myself to Broadbeach to get Gelato. and now i'm reading Twilight.. AFTER watching the movie with Jamie the other night. hahah. well i have 3.45h shit shift at work today. but Joseph is coming tonight (i think) and cause he's leaving the Pohlman palace forever, we will have to make it big...... muahahha. and i don't have to work the weekend either so it'll be fun timees... I'm going to accessorise my car now! put my girlish toolbox in my boot. how amazing. just needed a record of me getting my car back.. FINALLY! lovelove! (= leave your mark

08 oh, wow. [02 Jan 2009|08:28pm] 08 has been truly amazing. it definitely lived up to my expectations. i definitely had more fun than 2007. i travelled way more of Australia and did so much more than i ever imagined. Work experiences and got to know more people. I graduated from University. even though i don't have a job yet, i'm pretty sure something ought to come out... soon possibly, cause the thought of being stuck at IGA makes me want to punch myself silly so i can get insurance for it. haha. that bad. as always, going into another year i've reflected on the year and i have grown up even more and i am glad to say that i am happy with the person i am. despite minute flaws.. but all that can be overlooked. i have achieved so many things that i wanted to and feck, i've done more than i could ever ask for. i've met some truly amazing people this year who will always be in my heart. --- Enough sappiness. haha. new years eve was EVERYTHING WE HAD NOT PLANNED. we didn't end up going to the party ar Isle of Capri. We didn't evnd up being in Surfers.. but we did however end up seeing the Fireworks.. all 4 of them from different directions!! so happy! hahah. (= counted down the new years with Jeroen and Nerese. haha whowouldathunkit!? but nonetheless, i had fun cause we ended up in Surfers at 2 in the morning, mad rush to the beach to sing our national anthems and went to Renate's place to chill and then ended up flaling asleep after watching the sunrise on the beach.. till about 6.30am! oh the life!!! Came home at 6.30 am and fell asleep almost instantly after a shower. Then got a call from Simon asking if i wanted to go to the beach for a Surf.. ended up going to his place and falling asleep after a movie. haha it was pretty funny. and by the time we woke up.. it was too late to catch a wave.. so we decided to get lunch or lunner.. after much persuasion from me for Simon to wake up cause i was hungry and didn't have my car! so we bought lunch and got out the slowest movie in the history of the WORLD! then i fell asleep at 8.30PM after we watch Madagascar2!! hahah. We wanted to go to the beach today.. and haha didn't end up going either. instead he cooked me breakfast and we watched random movies... and then got a lift to work cause didn't have my car... so.. THANKS SIMON! (=.. good friend. anyway, all i wanted to say is that i hope this year will be more amazing than the last. and hope everyone had a new year.. no resolutions this year cause i don't really believe in them anymore.. i believe in being able to do what you want to do.. no matter what date it is! so yeah.. take care my loveliess and to my Singapore friends... i hope to see you guys this year!!!! leave your mark

[18 Dec 2008|09:44pm] why hello LJ, i have some exciting news.. i Graduate from uni tomorrow. i actually did it. finished it. graduating. yet, i'm not that excited. WHY? 2marks leave your mark

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